tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13382844779970269282023-11-15T05:26:48.483-08:00CPA By 40: A Thirtysomething's Re-EducationFoxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.comBlogger102125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-31337451788873009342010-11-29T08:32:00.000-08:002010-11-29T08:32:20.215-08:00Harold And Kumar Go Fuck Themselves.On the list of "Most Ridiculous Things I've Ever Been Asked to Write", this takes the cake. In management class, we watched an episode of "Undercover Boss" and had to write about the lessons White Castle can learn from their CEO's excursion.Words fail me. But I still had to crank out 1300 of them. This was the result.
Is This The Real Life? Is This Just Fantasy? Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-66868252886170358192010-10-28T02:14:00.000-07:002010-10-28T02:14:57.915-07:00Whom the gods would destroy, they first must make mad.(I'm planning to work on some new material next month that I want to collect into a book of essays for submission to a publisher. In order to keep my writing chops up, I decided to sit down for a bit and come up with some new material for the blog. This was just a one-draft, unrevised piece; I don't expect anyone to take it too seriously.)
“Empiricism, Or: Why There Ain't No Such Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-57230309765305549832010-10-08T15:27:00.000-07:002010-10-08T15:27:42.702-07:00Imagine all the people, living life without that Commie bastard.I'm no longer in a position where I can write about history for an actual history class, but that doesn't mean I don't still have a lot to say on the topic. I wrote this in response to my friend Rob from Philadelphia, who mentioned "Imagine" on Facebook and started an interesting chain of thoughts in my head. 1980: The Year Glory Stirred From Its Slumber
Dennis L. “Fox” Doucette
Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-39391113849246403122010-09-29T17:13:00.000-07:002010-09-29T17:13:51.207-07:00The Cycle of Life (MGT323 Paper)This took me 38 minutes to write from start to finish. Sometimes I even amaze myself. Chapter 4 of my textbook contained the background about Maslow and the Expectancy Theory.
Tour de Psychobabble Or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying And Love Chapter 4
For Lance Armstrong, his surviving testicular cancer and his motivation to win seven consecutive Tours de France can be Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-59056599347839751042010-09-22T21:05:00.000-07:002010-09-22T21:05:43.059-07:00Social Misadventures V: Can't Fake the Funk.There's a "networking event" on campus Friday evening. It's mandatory for students taking Management 321 (Effective Business Writing) because someone got it in their heads that a writing course should come bundled with the college trying to do something about Nevada's 14.3% worst-in-the-nation unemployment besides tell everyone they're special.
This is all well and good except for one Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-26505556851181027772010-09-14T09:04:00.000-07:002010-09-14T09:04:52.807-07:00Memo to the Higher-Ups(my Effective Business Writing professor makes us submit a hard copy of our first draft along with the finished assignment for no other reason than to penalize getting things right the first time. This time I decided "fuck it, might as well make the first draft funny." Enjoy. Note that "Marty Chernov" was the fictitious person named in the assignment in the textbook.)
To:Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-38833495213819091412010-09-08T07:06:00.000-07:002010-09-08T07:06:24.536-07:00Pseudoscience! Bullshit! It must be MANAGEMENT!This was written for Management 323 (Organizational Behavior) after we were instructed to take a Myers-Briggs-style personality assessment and get "one friend or family member and one business associate" to report on the findings. You can guess how I felt about this.
Your Horoscope For Today: Personality Type Report
P.T. Barnum once said “There's a sucker born every Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-7822373285989292962010-08-30T23:47:00.000-07:002010-08-30T23:47:47.271-07:00CPA By 40 Returns From Summer Hiatus!First assignment for Management 321 (Effective Business Writing): Write a memo introducing myself, my goals, and my interests. Of course, I wouldn't be sharing if I didn't think this was inherently interesting, but in the future somehow I doubt I'll be mining much in the way of entertainment value for you the reader out of a course that bastardizes the writing process and distills it into Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-53869146603332342722010-07-01T16:58:00.000-07:002010-07-01T16:58:23.065-07:00If Financiers Taught Second GradeI often hear bandied about the "fact" that there are $600-700 trillion dollars in derivative contracts that are supposedly going to make the whole economy go boom and have us all selling pencils to each other for a nickel apiece like the stories my grandfather told me about the Great Depression (q.v. last month's history paper.) What's interesting is how they arrive at this figure; wheneverFoxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-8277681176191167552010-06-29T23:36:00.000-07:002010-06-29T23:36:52.079-07:00On MotivationI have a final exam in Math 176 (Applied Calculus) tomorrow morning. Almost exactly eleven hours from now, in fact. If I get at least an 84 on it, I go a perfect 15-for-15 in getting A's in my classes at TMCC---a perfect score to carry forward to Nevada-Reno this fall for the start of my junior year. I've been thinking a lot about what's been motivating and driving me recently, Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-34722978573827842682010-06-23T01:43:00.000-07:002010-06-23T01:43:44.573-07:00What a difference a year makes.So just for kicks I read my previous 93 scribblings calling themselves blog entries since May 27 of last year when I started this damn fool thing. What jumps out at me is just how much of my evolution, from "devoted husband" to "lost soul in desperate need of validation" to my current status that doesn't fit neatly into quotation marks, comes through in every word. What also jumps outFoxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-4292983168639605062010-06-02T14:30:00.000-07:002010-06-02T14:30:07.835-07:00Long-Forgotten Memories of Our Fallen Glory: America 1845-1989Written for my Core Humanities class as the spring final. Reading it over again, I love this irreverent writing format when I use it. So enjoy.
Question 1: On the Mexican-American War and great Americans therein. On April 25, 1846, the Mexican army slaughtered 70 innocent, defenseless Americans along the border. This wasn't over drugs or work visas like an attack of that nature wouldFoxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-33794992369670409802010-05-29T23:57:00.000-07:002010-05-29T23:57:12.195-07:00OK, I'm just going to think out loud and freely for a minute. You mind?I can't even fucking believe myself anymore. It's like my mind wants to fuck everything up just so I can feel more comfortable in the role of the underdog, and truly it makes me sick to my fucking stomach to even contemplate just how much I've become my own worst enemy.
And I know exactly why. You've heard the bullshit about the kid whose mommy didn't love him enough and who didn't Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-26531130903561884572010-05-13T23:51:00.000-07:002010-05-13T23:51:09.114-07:00It came in live and loud.Lessons learned in the past 16 weeks:
- I've accomplished more in the five months since my divorce than I did in five years of marriage. I never realized just how toxic my ex-wife was because she kept me just satisfied enough not to aspire to anything better. In the process I learned that I'm a little too easily subdued by a nice pair of tits for my own good.
- Finals week taught meFoxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-19815921074151270982010-04-27T13:29:00.000-07:002010-04-27T13:29:43.206-07:00Let the Big Dog Eat.Another college paper, this one for Core Humanities. Stuff like this is apparently why that teacher thinks I'm in the wrong racket and should be writing for a living---of this one he said "Excellent, intelligent, and irreverent. 100%, A." Enjoy!
Art/Technology/Great Inventions Paper: American Food Or: Getting Fat On Four Dollars a Day
Context
If one is to Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-5363000543357603032010-04-06T10:32:00.000-07:002010-04-06T10:32:38.823-07:00Where The Wild Grades Are IISpring Break and midterms have come and gone. Time for a quick look at how in the hell I'm doing as I try to get straight A's for an entire academic year for the first time since 1987 (fourth grade!) In order of class time:
Sociology 205 (Diversity):
Still don't have the grade for my research paper. It's 100 points (out of 360), so the grade more or less hinges on this one.&Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-37290796606600832072010-04-04T10:22:00.000-07:002010-04-04T10:22:07.631-07:00Dude, Where's My God?If you will indulge me flagrantly stepping on other people's religion, a crackpot theory about Christianity's holiest day:
On Good Friday, the Romans crucified Jesus. The Apostles buried him, then in order to drown their sorrows they got really, REALLY drunk. Like "two-day bender" drunk. Then Sunday morning came around and they wanted to go check up on the burial, pay their Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-19840016040932297262010-03-30T11:01:00.000-07:002010-03-30T11:01:15.606-07:00Ethnic Soup or: Teaching Diversity to Glenn Beck(This was written for Sociology 205: Ethnic Groups in Contemporary Society. Topic was "compare and contrast the adaptation strategies of the Hopi, the Amish, and the Rom/Gypsies. How have their strategies helped to preserve their cultural identity, and have they been successful in allowing them to adapt to their position of isolation from the dominant cultures of their respective Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-82977607825020063922010-03-24T14:02:00.000-07:002010-03-24T14:02:28.995-07:001500 Words of Bostonian Jingoism.(Regular readers of this space know that my Core Humanities professor ardently believes that I'm wasting my talents in accounting and that I should be a writer. This is the most recent paper I wrote for his class---I got an A on it. I share it here so you may make up your own mind about whether my writing is any good. Comments are welcomed---I'd like to know what my own Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-87111905272040333372010-03-22T22:53:00.000-07:002010-03-22T22:53:46.951-07:00Assigned LivelyWhat an interesting day. I could eat the shifting perspectives with a spoon.
My Mondays and Wednesdays are usually polluted by a hefty dose of cognitive dissonance and boredom in the morning. I start my day with a white-guilt diversity class, which is then immediately followed up by a US History class heavy on the "yay white people" Manifest Destiny point of view. It's roughly Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-55566979716983436952010-03-18T03:24:00.000-07:002010-03-18T03:24:55.704-07:00Givin' 'Em the Business IINo sooner do I say I need to do more writing than I spend six days doing exactly that---nowhere near my blog, of course. Go figure. Anyway, I've got a good excuse and it's high time I brought everyone up to speed. Since the last iteration of this ran five weeks ago, the "starting a business" part has come damn near front and center in my life. My stated primary goal Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-37113179955764071692010-03-12T14:38:00.000-08:002010-03-12T14:38:42.763-08:00For My Next Trick, I'll Make My Stress...Disappear!At long last, spring break is upon me. Seven weeks into classes, I've learned that my limit has been reached; I've already cut over 12 hours from my schedule every week as I move toward the goal of "degree, radio show, and girlfriend, and to hell with everything else". I can now say I'm down to only 45-48 hours of work where before it wasn't unusual for me to go over sixty.
I have Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-60076367559916561322010-03-02T02:17:00.000-08:002010-03-02T02:17:13.989-08:00Rerun RacketI notice I haven't had much to report in this space of late. This has been due to a variety of factors, and in an indulgence of my right to bloviate for its own sake, I'm going to simply recap them here.
First and foremost, all the news that's fit to print is news that's been printed in this space before. My core humanities prof continues to lean on me to develop my writing toward a Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-56336164947922204182010-02-20T11:03:00.000-08:002010-02-20T11:03:38.324-08:00Saturday Realm CollisionI don't rightly recall signing up for manic depression.
This week has been one of those situations where everything either goes exceptionally well or exceptionally poorly, with no middle ground and the good (and bad) subject to change with neither warning nor notice. Some of my projects have gone perfectly. Got an A on my first accounting project without even having to deliver a Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1338284477997026928.post-2588397129425444982010-02-17T14:46:00.000-08:002010-02-17T14:46:34.505-08:00The BS Overflow Disaster and Other FictionI swear it was the nachos.
Saturday morning I woke up single. Stopped by Del Taco in the early afternoon because a day off without nachos is hardly a day off at all. Somewhere in the dark corners of the Internet I met a girl. Eleven hours of conversation, an overnight Valentine's date at her place that turned into a Monday morning to remember at mine, and a lot of divine Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18232314177797311854noreply@blogger.com3